"Better than a thousand hollow words, is one word that brings peace."
-Buddha
To forgive and forget.
To forget to forgive.
To forgive and never forget.
As emotional, irrational human beings, we tend to get angry or irritated over really stupid things. Why we do this is for some other post. Right now, I'm musing on what we do after the initial emotions have played out, and we're left looking back on the moment. Do we truly forgive and forget the slight, as if it suddenly meant nothing to us? Do we tend to get so caught up in what we think is righteous anger that when it's played out we forget to forgive someone and release both of us from the travesty. Or do we forgive and secretly never forget what has happened to us, keeping it in the back of your mind for years to come? Somehow, all of these seem to ring slightly selfish to me in the grand scheme of life.
You see, I think in reality, we all wish we never had to forgive someone. That the people we know would never irk us, piss us off, or make us so incredibly frustrated that we shut ourselves down when we're together. We wish they could hold incredible understanding, empathy, patience, caring, and maturity in the palm of their hands while they spoke to you and acted around you. We may not wish they were perfect, but we do wish they would try harder toward perfection.
What it comes down to is that we rarely forgive people, sincerely forgive them, for the wrongs that hit closest to the ego and the heart, the things that matter the most to us. And we don't easily forget such things either. Instead, we build them up in the back of our minds, until one day they boil over with repression.
No one's perfect, we all know the cliche, time worn, slightly annoying expression. But we almost use it as an excuse now, used to let people off the hook. Obviously, going around judging people and holding all their flaws against them isn't the way to go, but there are such things as accountability, maturity, and common courtesy that everyone is expected to have. It's another one of those damnable balancing acts that makes living a peaceful life something you strive for for your entire existence, if that's your thing.
In sincerity, I don't know what message I'm trying to leave my readers. I put almost as much energy into trying not to hold grudges and getting pissy with people as I might use if I did hold those grudges and let my singular irritations with the world affect the way I treat people. In the end, it's anyone's guess what we should or should not do with our lives and emotions. It all comes down to trial and error. Hopefully we survive the social and physical tests that go askew, and find that solid and irrefutable truth within such an experience. More like then not, we won't, and we'll go about living comfortably sheltered by our happy ignorance of the shittier side of life.
To forget to forgive.
To forgive and never forget.
As emotional, irrational human beings, we tend to get angry or irritated over really stupid things. Why we do this is for some other post. Right now, I'm musing on what we do after the initial emotions have played out, and we're left looking back on the moment. Do we truly forgive and forget the slight, as if it suddenly meant nothing to us? Do we tend to get so caught up in what we think is righteous anger that when it's played out we forget to forgive someone and release both of us from the travesty. Or do we forgive and secretly never forget what has happened to us, keeping it in the back of your mind for years to come? Somehow, all of these seem to ring slightly selfish to me in the grand scheme of life.
You see, I think in reality, we all wish we never had to forgive someone. That the people we know would never irk us, piss us off, or make us so incredibly frustrated that we shut ourselves down when we're together. We wish they could hold incredible understanding, empathy, patience, caring, and maturity in the palm of their hands while they spoke to you and acted around you. We may not wish they were perfect, but we do wish they would try harder toward perfection.
What it comes down to is that we rarely forgive people, sincerely forgive them, for the wrongs that hit closest to the ego and the heart, the things that matter the most to us. And we don't easily forget such things either. Instead, we build them up in the back of our minds, until one day they boil over with repression.
No one's perfect, we all know the cliche, time worn, slightly annoying expression. But we almost use it as an excuse now, used to let people off the hook. Obviously, going around judging people and holding all their flaws against them isn't the way to go, but there are such things as accountability, maturity, and common courtesy that everyone is expected to have. It's another one of those damnable balancing acts that makes living a peaceful life something you strive for for your entire existence, if that's your thing.
In sincerity, I don't know what message I'm trying to leave my readers. I put almost as much energy into trying not to hold grudges and getting pissy with people as I might use if I did hold those grudges and let my singular irritations with the world affect the way I treat people. In the end, it's anyone's guess what we should or should not do with our lives and emotions. It all comes down to trial and error. Hopefully we survive the social and physical tests that go askew, and find that solid and irrefutable truth within such an experience. More like then not, we won't, and we'll go about living comfortably sheltered by our happy ignorance of the shittier side of life.
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